Okay, as a wife and mother, I guess I’m never really truly alone ever, let alone for the holidays. But, in a year when so many are disappointed to find themselves alone (or at least with just immediate family) for the Christmas, I relish it.
I should start by clarifying that I’m Jewish and don’t actually celebrate Christmas. For me, Christmas is a magical day. One when I don’t have to work no matter what day of the week it is. I get to sleep in (as much as the girls will let me). And we plan the day that we want to have. A big family breakfast? Sure, why not. Long walk through the quiet neighborhood woods? Sign me up! Cocoa and movies in front of the fireplace? Let me get the afghan!
My family has always been alone on Christmas making it into an automatic family day. And one that I have come to really enjoy. Look forward to even. As Chanukah usually falls earlier in the month, by the time we get to Christmas, I’ve already sprinted from Thanksgiving (which often involves a lot of baking, as you can see here) into 8 nights of candle-lighting and gift-giving, all while juggling what is often a very busy time at work, since clients want to “get this done before the holidays”.
So, while I may not be celebrating the religious or cultural holiday of Christmas, it has come to hold great meaning to our family as a day of togetherness, alone.
When Holidays Collide
Last year, Chanukah overlapped with Christmas. We decided to host our Jewish friends for a Chanukah party on Christmas. Suddenly we were just like everyone else, preparing to spend Christmas with friends. There was decorating to be done. There was food to prepare. (In full transparency, we ordered Chinese, like good Jews. But I did make latkes!) There were desserts to bake (obviously!).
It was so much fun to have an excuse to gather. “Why not celebrate Christmas together every year?” we wondered. As the kids alternated between decorating Chanukah-themed cookies, sprinkles skittering across the floor, and full-body contact sports in the basement, the adults sat around the dining room table, eating, drinking, laughing. And, perhans starting a new tradition of gathering our Jewish friends on Christmas.
Finding the Joy Again
But before we could say the words “new tradition”, the pandemic took it all away. Along with our old traditions! So this year, like everyone else, we are back to being alone for Christmas.
So, how do you enjoy being alone for Christmas when you’ve tasted the sweet joy of celebrating with friends?
Focus on gratitude. Gratitude for what we have in our lives. Especially this year. We will sleep in, grateful to have a roof over our heads. For jobs that are keeping us so busy, we are grateful for the day of relaxation.
Grateful for curb-side grocery pick-up and food delivery as we enjoy breakfast. Grateful for our health as we visit the ponds in our neighborhood in search of our newest neighbor, the North American River Otter. Grateful for each other’s’ company. Grateful for our safety in a tumultuous year.
We will miss the joy of sharing good food with good friends. But we will enjoy this year alone focused on the light at the end of the tunnel and the promise that a new year holds, hopeful that next year we won’t be alone for Christmas.